Lesson 4: Gender and Family Life

Are men and women different? Television shows, music, advertisements, stores and wage earnings would have us believe they're more different than same. However, we're more alike than not. We have similar needs (survival, self-esteem, intimacy, growth, control, achievement, and recreation). We each experience feelings, what to give and receive support in personal trials and want to belong. So why this battle of the sexes for who's better and what roles we need to fulfill? 

Because we ARE different. We express feelings differently, and experience different types of emotion. Our attention spans, aspirations, diseases and addictions, life expectancy and structure of the brain all differ between each gender. 

Confused yet? We all are. This is part of where the feminist movement came up. They wanted to make women a valuable part of society; not for the way they held their napkins, softly agreed with their men or looked, but because they actually have something to contribute. This movement however got out of hand when it argued that women were better. Isn't this what they were fighting? That not one gender is of more value than the other? Two words: messed up. 

While I love how women were at the center of the fight for equality (I mean, we are now able to vote, own land, work outside the house, and keep our children after a divorce), I hate how it's now gotten to where our men are belittled. 

We also talked about Same-Sex Attraction (SSA) and it's root and effect on gender roles and the family. In an article we read for class, "Homosexuality: Innate and Immutable? What Science can and cannot say" by A. Dean Byrd, it was discussed that studies done to show that SSA is genetic were biased and didn't have a large enough sample size (aka it wasn't representative of the population). What really irked me is that Lisa Diamond was quoted as saying "It may well be that for now, the safest way to advocate for lesbian/gay/bisexual rights is to keep propagating a deterministic model; sexual minorities are born that way and can never be otherwise. If this is an easier route to acceptance (which may in fact be the case), is it really so bad that it is inaccurate?"

WHAT?!?!

I'm not terribly concerned with the causes of SSA (for the sake of this post). What I'm concerned about is the "facts" behind it. Especially with the previous quote by Ms. Diamond. If we accept inaccurate information, no matter what the subject, doesn't' that make us liars? I would rather struggle with the truth than to be coddled by a lie. If you want me to accept something, tell me the truth and let me work it out for myself. I worked in collections for two years (not exactly important but...) and in one of our team meetings it was brought up that we needed to "not raise our voice, but improve our argument." This connotates intelligent research and not bending the results in order to fit some agenda. If you want me to rally behind SSA/Marriage, give me the benefits to society, give me the results that it's healthy and it works. DON'T LIE TO ME! 

I'm a firm believer that marriage is between a man and a women, not just because of my religious beliefs (which you can read more about here), but because I've read the research (some of which is shown here) academia has provided. I'm not homophobic or hate those that are different, just because our beliefs don't match up. I believe in love and kindness and finding a common ground. I believe in finding the value in others and developing their strengths and dreams because they're HUMAN BEINGS. 

I'm forever being propelled by an advertisement done by Airbnb, that show's regardless of race, religion, ability, experience or status, mankind has IMMENSE value.

("Is man kind? Are we good? Go see. Look thru their windows so you can understand their views. Sit at their tables so you can share their tastes.  Sleep in their beds so you may know their dreams. Go see, and find out just how kind  the hes and shes of this man kind are.")